What is Rumination?

What is Rumination?

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Have you ever found yourself stuck on a negative thought that you just can’t let go of? Maybe it’s something awkward that you said four years ago, or you feel inadequate in some way and your brain is busy digging up evidence to prove it’s true. One moment, the thought pops into your head, the next you’ve spent hours replaying it and picking it apart, but you’re no closer to a resolution. If this sounds familiar, you’re not a stranger to rumination. 

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We all have negative thoughts every now and then, but when we repeatedly dwell on these thoughts for long periods of time, that’s when it tips over into rumination. When something’s worrying or bothering us, it’s natural to want to find a solution. We might go over and over a situation in our heads to try and ‘fix it’, but in reality, this just keeps us focused on the thought, and we can end up in a distressing loop.

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Rumination is common from time to time, but when it starts becoming your new normal, this can be a sign of a mental health issue, and it can also lead to one. If you’re struggling with negative thoughts, it can help to learn more about why this might be happening and how to manage them.

Rumination vs emotional processing

Rumination and emotional processing often get confused because they seem similar, but they’re actually very different: 

• Emotional processing is where you reflect on a situation and work through your thoughts and feelings to understand them better. This helps us to be more self-aware and grow from the experience. 
• Rumination is where you repeatedly dwell on negative thoughts, but nothing good comes from it and there’s no resolution. This can lead to you feeling low, anxious and distressed. 

Signs that you’re ruminating:

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• You’re repeatedly focusing on negative thoughts and you struggle to come away from them
• No matter how many times you go over the problem, you don’t feel any closer to finding a solution, accepting it and moving on
• You end up feeling worse than you did before you focused on the thought

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Rumination often focuses on things like:

• Past mistakes
• Embarrassing moments
• Things you wish you did or didn’t say 
• Times you felt hurt or rejected
• Feeling like you’re not good enough
• Worrying about a current or future problem, like finances or a daunting work event

Why do we ruminate? 

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Most of us will have ruminated over something at some point, for instance, a relationship problem or some lukewarm work feedback that makes you question whether you’re actually good at your job. We might get caught up obsessing over a situation because we want to fix it, make sense of it, or reassure ourselves. The problem is that rumination doesn’t lead to a solution, it generally makes us feel worse instead.

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Some people might be more likely to ruminate due to:

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• A lack of self-esteem, which can lead you to question yourself, feel bad about yourself, and dwell on what others think of you
• Stress in your life, which creates situations that you worry about
• Feeling like you don’t have control over a situation
• A history of trauma
• Perfectionism where you set impossibly high standards for yourself, and criticize yourself when you don’t meet them
• A mental health issue, including anxiety, depression, obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD), eating disorders and post traumatic stress disorder (PTSD)

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A lot of the time, rumination isn’t a sign of anything serious and these kinds of thoughts don’t hang around for too long. But, if you find that you’re obsessing over things frequently and you’re struggling to control your thoughts, it could be that there’s something bigger going on that you need to look into.

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How do you manage rumination?

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• Distract yourself

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Break away from the negative thoughts by getting out of your head and doing something distracting. You could watch a feel-good film, call or meet a friend, or do some exercise for a dose of endorphins. 

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• Be kind to yourself

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If you’re worrying about something you did in the past, give yourself a little grace. Remember, we all make mistakes. We’re only human. One mistake doesn’t make you a bad person. It’s okay to forgive yourself and move on. Now read that again. 

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• Build your self-esteem 

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Do your negative thoughts tend to sound like ‘I’m not good enough’, ‘I’m worthless’ or ‘I don’t matter’? If so, your self-esteem could be to blame. There are different things you can do to boost your confidence, like investing time in yourself and talking to yourself positively. We've written more about this here.

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• Challenge your thoughts

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Remember, thoughts are not facts. Just because your brain is telling you something, doesn’t mean that you have to accept it as the truth. Instead, push back and challenge the thought. For instance, if your brain is highlighting an embarrassing moment, ask yourself whether it really matters and if anyone (other than you) will remember it anyway.

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• Shift to problem-solving mode

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Rather than dwelling on the problem, you could try to find a solution instead. Instead of asking yourself ‘why did I do that?’ or ‘what’s wrong with me?’, you could ask yourself:

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• What can I learn from this?
• What would I say to a friend in this situation?
• Is this something I will care about in a year’s time?

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• Get support if you need it

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If rumination is something that you can’t manage on your own, don’t be afraid to seek professional help for your mental health. Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) can help you to recognise and challenge negative thought patterns and give you the tools to deal with them when they happen. 

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At ieso, we offer typed CBT for a range of mental health issues, including anxiety, depression, PTSD and OCD. Our online service is flexible with appointment times that fit around you, and you can join sessions from the comfort of your own home. We also offer video calls in some areas if you’d prefer to chat face-to-face. Find out more.